Damn. It has been almost 4 months exactly since I have touched this blog. OOFTA!

I would like to say that it was because I was on some grand adventure traveling the world or helping orphans in Africa but that is not the case. I just had no motivation, energy, or inspiration to put anything worth time into writing. I was just 'blah'. But not anymore!

I can honestly say that at this point in my life I am the happiest I have ever been.

Quick little summary of what is going on in my life:
  I got a new job, moved into a new town home, got my stupid birth control yanked out (C'mon baby!), I'm helping a friend out with wedding planning, and I have been trying to get my shit together. And it's actually coming all together finally! My son Max is on summer vacay, my husband is rocking out amazing tattoos left and right <<SO PROUD OF HIM!>>, and one of my best friends, who I haven't seen in over a year, is coming home for almost 2 weeks . Minus the mountain of laundry and the state of my closet, life is pretty freekin grand right now. 

Oh yeah, I also quit drinking.

Big deal ^^^ I was not doing too great before we cut out the booze...

Honestly, I was majorly depressed. I hated myself physically, mentally, and I was kind of a hot mess. I put a lot of effort into hiding my pain and putting on pretty face but  my spirit was draining out of me one day at a time. I couldn't enjoy all of the amazing things in my life because I was struggeling to find the meaning in what I was doing with my life. 

After we quit drinking I started waking up with a clear mind, energy I never had before, and the gross bloated feeling I always fealt went away. And we are saving tons of money... yay for paying bills on time! Step 1.

I had a new job therefore something new to learn and strive for... don't get me wrong, I love my other job, but my brain needed something new. Never underestimate the power of your wardrobe- I loved the opportunity to put together new outfits and try a more professional look every day. Step 2.

Moving into a new home gave me the opportunity for a 'fresh start'. I left the negative feelings, fights, and misery at the old place (sorry new tenant!). I know that running from my problems by moving hasn't literally solved my problems but the new place symbolizes a new outlook for me. Love, Positivity, Encouragement, and Hope. Step 3.

I finally had hope that I could be the woman I wanted to be. I woke up smiling, came home from work smiling, and went to bed smiling. My heart was simply happy. I found confidence in myself with starting a new job, purpose in helping plan and make fun crafty things for a wedding, and appreciation for my husband who works his butt off and a son who never fails to make me laugh. Now I look forward to missing my period- that means baby #2- and focusing on what I want to do with my future because I don't have that fog weighing me down every day.

I finally got off my ass and made shit happen! I don't hide in an alternate reality of books and televison anymore so I can forget that the sink is full of dishes and I'm a month behind on bills. I love to escape into a good book and reality tv still amuses me but I do the dishes first. No more pushing responsibilties and problems to the side to figure out later. Just freekin' do it and then reward yourself with things you love. You will enjoy those things so much more.

Sooo really, I solved a lot of crap when I stopped drinking. That was the root of a lot of my evils. 

Save money=pay bills on time=almost zero financial stress. 


Less liquid calories and sugar=less bloat=weight loss=feel great, look great. 


No hangovers=clear mind=wake up before 10=motivation to face the full day.  


Clear mind=less stress=feel great=less fights=better relationships=happiness for everyone.

YAYYY for the here and now, YAYYY for the future, and YAYYY for me. For once I can finally say "Life is good" and truly mean it. 


I have a feeling I will be visiting my little online journal more than ever... my brain is seriously packed full of awesomeness.

Hi my name is Brittany... remember me?? Well...

I'm in a funk. I've been uninspired, unproductive, and antisocial. Its the nastiest combo of subzero temperatures and poopy weather (thank you Minnesnowta), feeling unhealthy physically and mentally, and stressing about everything from missed phone calls to bills that makes me want to crawl into a hole and hide most days. No bueno. I know I'm not alone but how do I dig myself out of this hole? 

There are 3 areas in my life that need a little extra TLC: finances, relationships with others, and my relationship with myself. 

  The hardest part is fixing the relationship with myself. I feel physically and mentally weak.  Instead of taking steps to find myself again, I go into a zombie-like state and dig myself a deeper hole which then causes any other issues I may have to grow... so frustrating! I know I  sound touch crazy but it's like an inner war- one part of my brain assesses the situation at hand and wants to move forward with a solution, but then the other part of my brain says "Nap now and figure it out later." Some days are better than others but you get the idea right?
      I hate it. I know I have so much more potential and talent that I'm suppressing myself from. It's going to take some time and a lot of work but I know I can break this. I've done it before.                           stupid winter blues...

soooo... Baby steps. 

1.  Address the issue/Figure out the problem.
2.  Write it down. Make a list. It helps to get it out of your head and physically see the problem.
    3.  Figure out your goal and write down what you want the end result to be.
    4.  Establish a system or set of realistic steps that will lead to you accomplishing your goal/resolving your "issue".
    5.  Take the steps one at a time and cross them off your list as you go so that you can see yourself 
          moving closer to the solution.
    6.  Post your plan in a place you will see it daily. Don't let yourself push away the issue to take care of later. 
          Forgetting your problems won't make them any better.
   7.  Celebrate and reward yourself once you've accomplished your goal. Even the tiniest baby step 
         forward takes you closer to the light at the end of the tunnel.

Everyone goes through rough patches in life and sometimes it's hard to remember that things will get better. Stressing out about things like bills, work, and relationships is totally normal and everyone does it but when you are in that situation you tend to feel pretty alone. Now, don't think that I'm about to go off the deep end or run off to hide because it really is slowly getting better. I am getting out of the house and hanging out with friends, going to work, and even applied for a new part time job.  Taking life day by day.  I am so fortunate to have amazing people in my life who I can talk to and help me out. That really helps. Sometimes your brain just fills up with shit and you need someone to vent to that will bring an outside perspective to the situation. We all have a little drama queen inside of us who can blow things way out of proportion. Your friends and family or even a coworker can help reign you in and get a hold of the situation as well. So don't be ashamed if you have the blues or are feeling a little down- it happens to even the best of us- talk to someone, talk to yourself even (don't worry you aren't crazy), write it down... just get it out of your system! And once you have gotten it out of your system or figured out your "fix-it" plan, watch a funny movie or read a good book, just remember to occasionally do things that lift your spirit and help you to forget your stress for an hour or two. All work and no play makes for an absolutely miserable-crap hole-depressing black hole of all joy-make you pluck your eyeballs out-shitty life. No thanks.
                                   

    Do something that really makes you happy or makes you feel good.

It is important to stick to your plan and move forward but it is just as important to laugh a little. Love. Smile. Hug someone. Sometimes it really blows being a grown up and living in the real world but it's also really freekin' awesome discovering who you truly are and being able to choose where you want your life to go. You only live once so don't let yourself waste your life away with stress and anger. Smile. SMILE RIGHT NOW. Watch this funny cat video. Or this funny cat video. And appreciate that you have an entire world of beautiful places to see, amazing food to eat, wonderful people to love, and countless memories to be made.

When you're young everyone asks "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Some of us want to be doctors, lawyers, astronauts, etc. and in my case, I dreamed of becoming a STAR. The next Shirley Temple. Movies, tv shows, sing-a-longs… hell why not name a drink after me?! Hmph. 

So I got a little older and started to figure out "Who I was" and plans became a little more realistic, but I still had big dreams.

The idea was to get through school, graduate, party it up in college, and then get said degree. Find a job. Make millions. Find a husband and have babies. Achieve Brittany's big dreams!

Well, we all know life happens. We develope friendships. then relationships. party. take tests/fail tests/ace tests. grow boobs (if we're lucky). get in fights with our parents. think we know everything about the world. The ups and downs, ins and outs, but it will all be alright because when we are adults we will have time to be perfect and do everything right. When you are young you are the 'dreamer' and when you are 'old' you become the 'do-er'. 

Well sometimes life really throws you for a loop. And in my case, it was a pretty big freekin' loop. I had to be a 'do-er' a little earlier than planned.

I was 17 years young when I found out I had a bun in my little oven- of course me growing boobs couldn't just be a lucky growth spurt- and all of my plans had to be alterted a little. Scared shitless, I had to come to terms with one helluva 'oopsie.' My parents and family were very supportive and I had a blast shopping for baby clothes with my mom instead of deodorant and tampons! But the thing that I am most grateful for is that I had a 'baby daddy' who stood by my side through the entire process. And after 8 years of craziness, I call that 'baby daddy' my husband, Adam. He can be a pain in the ass sometimes but I could'nt have done it without him!                  I digress.

So at 17, my plans for the future were put on the back burner.  Instead of checking out colleges I was checking out apartments. Shopping for shoes turned into shopping for diapers. And having a giant preggo belly while trying to fight through the high school cafeteria was hell. God forbid some little twerp got in the way of me and my taco salad. I was ready to  snap necks left and right. But at least I had a few months to prepare and have everything ready right?? Wrong.

My little bun didn't want to stay in the oven. After a long and stressful night (thanks OPD) that I will most likely share later,  I gave birth via C-section to my 4.6 pound son Maximus. Seven weeks premature. He really was and is my little gladiator. The story of his birth and the months to follow is a story for another time, but I reassure you he is healthier and happier than I could have ever asked for. And it was nothing like that bullshit you see on Teen Mom << don't even get me started.

Skipping over a little and getting to the moral of my story…  shit happens. Sometimes its a huge life altering event such as mine, and sometimes its just a minor set back. But we all have dreams. We have all at one point made big plans for ourselves. Even though your plans change a little, do not forget what your dream is. 

My big dream is no longer to because a STAR- I wouldn't object to it- but I'm thinking more along the lines of what is best for my family as a whole. But I still have dreams and big plans for how I envision my life. In a way, I'm lucky because I don't have to stress over creating my perfect family because I already have it so now it is time for me to get OFF MY ASS and start DOING SOMETHING about these dreams. No more procrastinating. Baby steps. Vision boards?? Whatever can get me a little closer to becoming the woman, mother, and wife that I dream to be.

I knew I hoarded all of those magazines for a reason.

Keep dreaming. Never let anyone bring you down. You are in control of your life and you can make it happen.

Lets get this show on the road!
If you need a little help getting started:

• The Secret … I was very inspired by this movie that I found on Netflix and know many who loved the book!
• Self help books… they're really quite inspiring.
• Vision boards… if you're a visual person these are great! (Oprah even supports this idea)
• Journals, Timelines, and Bucketlists… it really helps to get your thoughts onto paper and put it all together.
• They even have Apps!

No two human beings are exactly the same. We may find similarities in physical appearance and personality but no one on the entire planet is exactly like you. Isn't that fascinating?! You should feel special that you are literally one of a kind. You can thank your parents for how you look- some genetics are better than others....thanks for the chicken legs dad- but the way we think, feel, and behave is (for the most part) a result of our personal life experiences.
       Therefore, in order to better understand my rantings and ravings it may be helpful for you to get to know me a little better. And if you enjoy spending a few precious moments of your life every week to read my blog you will get a better sense of my genius- or madness- however you may look at it.

                            So here we go...
                                                           The good, the bad, and the ugly.

I'm a hoarder, procrastinator, and a wee bit messy. I'm not very organized but there's usually a method to my madness. I'm very stubborn and always right. And woooweee baby do I love to debate... but I also love to learn new things and am reasonable so you may have a chance. Patience is not my strongest quality and sometimes I'm a little selfish but can you honestly say you never are?

((Wow I sound like a horrid bitch but I promise I'm really not that bad. I just wanted to get the nasty stuff out of the way.))

I used to be pretty shy but that is getting better as I get older. It comes down to low confidence levels but I have been working on it and am going to continue doing so! I'm kind of a nerd and can get vveirrrrd. Sometimes I swear I'm an old lady trapped in a 24 year old body. I like to talk about inappropriate things but not in inappropriate situations so I guess I should be grateful for that! 

I love people and surrounding myself with all sorts of different personalities. I also hate people (don't get me started on black friday) and love to be alone to do my own thing. I am not very good at communicating when it's not face-to-face. Talking on the irks me- except with a select few- along with driving and overly large masses of bodies.  

I'm a girly-girl but not afraid to get dirty. I love camping (the real kind. in a tent. no makeup or curling irons) and I love nature. But I also love big cities and having the convenience of numerous tech devices. I can be a little of a juxtaposition. And I love it. I never want to be a boring, predictable, cookie-cutter gal.

For the most part I am a kind, loving and caring person. Sometimes I care a little too much for my own good. The hopeless romantic and emotional side of me tends to override the little sensibility I possess but that's much better than being a heartless witch! I'm a very creative and passionate woman..when something really sings to my soul you best believe I'm going to share it with as many people as possible. And that is one of the main reasons I started this blog thingy.

So you may be wondering what the point of this really is…. is it a fashion blog, makeup blog, fitness blog (psshhhh yeah right), foodie blog… WTF am I going to be talking about every week?!?! 


It is all of the above (very light on the fitness part). A lifestyle blog really. And a little bit of an experiment. 
It will be a journey of figuring out who I am, who I want to be, and how I plan on getting there. You're going to see projects I'm creating, new recipes I'm making my husband and son ingest, make up and fashion loves/hates, and most likely hear about some books and movies that I feel the whole wide world should experience. 

It's going to be a blast people. 
possibly a little messy and i'm not promising i won't be kinda odd at times. 
But gosh darnnit it sure as hell is not going to be boring!

Be sexy, but classy. Be fun, but grounded. Be different, but relatable. Just be you. Be the woman you want to be.  

So Marilyn Monroe may not have been the perfect housewife or a brain surgeon, but she was beautiful and proud. She owned her sexuality. She spoke her mind. It wasn't about prancing around in the buff or twerking your booty… it was showing a little collarbone or a slip of the thigh and being proud of what you have. OWN. IT. WOMAN! 
Maybe you're not a size zero or a big busted broad but you have amazing calves and know how to rock a set of red lips- all that matters is that you be you! I have seen stick thin pretty girls that are constantly searching for approval from others and I have seen curvy beautful women who own their bodies (and minds!) with the confidence and poise of a lioness…. who is more beautiful??? CONFIDENCE ladies!  It doesn't matter if you are big or small, if you are confident and feel beautiful, others will see that beauty shine. (There isn't anything wrong with a little makeup or a pair of great spanx to enhance what your mama gave you though!)
  Now, I am not the most confident woman and have so many insecurities, but that is what this is about. Recognizing that though I may not look like a Victoria's Secret model, I am beautiful and I should feel beautiful.  If I could have anything in the world (besides an unlimited Betsey Johnson shopping spree) it would confidence and a perfect credit score.

Don't just be proud of what you look like on the outside- be proud of what makes you different from everyone else! We are not robot bitches. I would die from extreme boredom if I had the same conversation with every Jack and Jill I ran into.  We all look, smell, speak, and act differently. I grew up with different people, in different places, listening to different music, and eating diffrent foods than you. Every experience of my life has lead to the person I am today. 
                                                                                         NO ONE CAN BE ME.
 We should all appreciate the indidvduals we are. My best friend is organized and knows her limits… I, on the other hand, am a hoarder and extreme procrastinator. Any of those things (except for maybe procrastination) can be good or bad in certian amounts, but we balance eachother. Another one of my friends is a conservative republican who is sooo opposite from me you would think that we would rip eachothers hair out. On the contrary, we have some of the best conversations I have ever had with any of my friends! If I wanted to hang out with the exact same person as I am I would sit at home. by myself. all damn day. BORING. 

As much as I want to try new looks and find what really makes me feel GORGEOUS, I also want to learn new things and expand my brain. Confidence comes from the inside and the out. Test yourself, experiment, and perfect what makes YOU happy.

So here it goes… here is to finding MY confidence, trying new things, setting goals (and not forgetting them), and not letting fear or laziness stop me from being the woman that I want to be. You only live once people.